"To get to forgiveness, we first have to work
through the painful experiences that require
it." -- Christiane Northrup
"We must let ourselves feel all the painful destruction we want to forgive rather than swallow it in denial. If we do not face it, we cannot choose to forgive it." -- Kenneth McNoll
"Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future." -- Paul Boese
"As long as you don't forgive, who and whatever it is will occupy rent-free space in your mind." -- Isabelle Holland
"Light burdens borne far become heavy." -- French proverb
"Forgiveness will never fail to free you." -- Jerrold Mundis
How do we
forgive when we're angry and hurt?
To forgive, we do not have to say that whatever happened was okay. It wasn't okay - we were hurt! In fact, before we can forgive, we need to allow ourselves to really feel the pain of what happened. If we don't fully acknowledge and experience our hurts, we will continue to carry them subconsciously and they will block and drain our energy.
The blessing is that when we're really ready to experience our pain and we open to it, it usually eases. By honouring our pain, we can release it.
To forgive, we need to decide that we won't allow the memories of the event to poison us any longer. We're ready to heal this wound from the past and open to a fresh new beginning.
And it helps to remember that people only hurt others when they themselves are in pain. When we can recognize the other person's suffering, our heart can open in compassion. We can also remember that at some time or another, we too have hurt someone through our own unskilful action.
Only love can heal the rifts caused by a hurtful deed. Forgiveness holds immense power because it mends separation. It moves us towards the unity and love that lie at the core of our being. It is a fundamental part of the healing process.
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